DVDs Or Death!

There's a lot coming out on DVD this week. That's right, it's time for DVDs Or Death!

The Bank Job.

Brief Synopsis: True Story Of A Bank Robbery Gone Bad.

Comments: Saw it in theater, and it irked me then. I'm a fan of heist films, as I've said numerous times already, but there was just something about the movie I didn't care for.

Viewing Option: T.V.

Penelope.

Brief Synopsis: Girl With Pig Nose Discovers True Love And Inner Beauty.

Comments: I just thought the movie looked weird. It didn't come to my theater, and it got a bunch of bad review, so I dunno...

Viewing Option: T.V.

College Road Trip.

Brief Synopsis: A Girl's Overprotective Father Takes Her On College Road Trip.

Comments: Didn't care to see it in theater, don't care to now.

Viewing Option: Skip.

Step Up 2 The Streets.

Brief Synopsis: Dance Movie With Cool... Dancing.

Comments: I was interested when it came to theater, but never saw it. This isn't the kind of movie you see for the plot or characters, but for the choreography and dancing. And I am a fan of watching dancing, and the trailer showed some really cool looking stuff.

Viewing Option: Rent.

Shutter.

Brief Synopsis: Yet Another Japanese Horror Remake. They're All The Same. (Bad).

Comments: Didn't care when it came out, and I don't care now.

Viewing Option: Skip.

Secretary.

Brief Synopsis: Re-Release Of Cult Classic That Has Maggie Gyllenhaal Naked A Lot.

Comments: Who wouldn't want that? I still have yet to see this movie, though, and I'll check it out at some point, but I'm in no rush.

Viewing Option: T.V.

THE BANK JOB.

Apparently I couldn’t be a professional movie critic, because I’d be disagreeing with what seems to be everybody on the planet. I thought I was going to see a heist movie… and I did, I suppose… though I’m not too sure… and I don’t think the movie was sure, either. The Bank Job is the true story about this one guy who is this drug dealing pimp black radical gangster who gets accused of all said charges, but the cops can’t do anything because he has illicit photos of one of the royal family that he can use as blackmail. So the cops get this one chick to get Jason Statham (who gets a crew of his own) to find a way to rob the bank and safety deposit boxes that the photos are held in. Unfortunately, that’s not all they take, and they end up over their heads in numerous scandals such as dirty cops and compromising sexual photos of prominent figures.

I first have to say that, even though this was based on a true story, it seemed way too complicated for what it was. Don’t get me wrong, by the end of the movie I understood everything that was going on and wasn’t confused whatsoever, but during the movie, everything was twisting and turning and this was going on while that was happening and so-and-so was being undercover while this-that-and-the-other were doing whatever the hell else was going on. And to me, the undercover woman who was with the black radical guys seemed to be an unnecessary subplot just used to complicate the matter.

The first act of the movie seemed too random and confusing at the time (with an insane amount of nudity). The second act of the movie, the actual heist, was way too short. The third act of the movie, the part where all the crooked cops and whatnot are trying to get back their information and such, seemed way too long. It also seemed like the movie wasn’t sure what it was trying to be. The first act seemed like a dark comedy (with a bit of drama). The second act was like a heist drama (with a bit of dark comedy). And the third act was just a violent, overdramatic, depressing thriller. When that third act hit, I was shocked. I wasn’t expecting that amount of violence and such, or for some of the people to die who did. The first half of the movie just didn’t set me up for that.

It wasn’t a terrible movie by any means, but I don’t think it deserves the awesome praise it’s getting from what seems to be almost every professional critic. The acting was alright, and it was pretty funny at times. The big fight at the end of the movie was some Jason Statham action, as always. And I really liked the idea behind it: a bunch of small-time crooks robbing a bank, finding more than they can chew, and then trying to get out of the situation both alive and while trying to do the right thing. I just don’t think it was executed as well as it could have been.

Stop Saying Okay! Okay.