2012.

For such a long movie, you'd think I'd have a lot to say. I really don't. It's pretty much what you'd expect from a Roland Emmerich film. It has a huge cast of seemingly unrelated yet interconnected characters played by the likes of John Cusack, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Amanda Peet, Thandie Newton, Danny Glover, Oliver Platt, and Woody Harrelson. It's the end of the world, so there's a lot of survivalist action mixed with family drama. Some will do anything to live. Some will stay behind to do the nobel thing yet die in the process. Others will be jerks and upset everybody. Someone will put themselves and/or others in jeopardy to save a dog. And somebody will inevitably try to act the hero and nearly die in the process.

It's not a bad movie. Is it predictable? Sure. Is it entertaining? Most of it (it starts to stretch itself a bit thin in its second hour). How is it acted? Averagely. Are the special effects good? Very. Do I care about the characters? At least two (Cusack and Ejiofor. Maybe Cusack's daughter).

The best part of the film is its action scenes, the scenes wherein our main characters are trying to escape certain death. The main two scenes (or at least the best two scenes) are within the first hour or so. The first is when the world is first starting to go, and Cusack has to get his family across town to the airport in a limo while everything is falling apart around them, which is immediately followed up by the small airplane sequence as seen in the trailers, with the plane flying low through the collapsing city (the 'flying low' thing makes more sense in the context of the film, I think, once you know the circumstances). The second is at Yellowstone, when Cusack goes to meet back up with Harrelson to figure out where the "ships" are to get to safety, and in the process gets stuck in the middle of a Super Volcano eruption. After these two scenes, you do see a lot of worldly destruction, but it doesn't involve any main characters, so you really don't care. The next major suspense scene is at the climax of the film, which I won't ruin.

This is why I believe the second hour drags a bit. The two biggest suspense scenes occur toward the end of the first hour/beginning of the second hour. Then you have about an hour stretch with no major suspense before the climax of the film. We probably could have lost the subplot with the two fathers on the cruise ship. If we wanted to keep the time length, we could have given more substance to the Chinese family, which would have made them more than just a Deus Ex Machina for our main cast. Instead, they get about 2 main scenes of less than 5 minutes or so total before they come back into the picture in the third act.

In other words, it looked good and it did have some decent entertainment. There were some parts that probably weren't meant to be funny that were. And I couldn't help but think of Fezzik (The Princess Bride) any time that Russian Businessman spoke. I expected him to start rhyming any second. But it was a bit too long and could have easily been trimmed down a bit, mostly in the second hour. But it was pretty much exactly what I expected, so I wasn't really let down, either.

Stop Saying Okay! Okay.

ZOMBIELAND.

From the moment I first saw the first trailer, I was hooked. I've been anticipating this movie for so long, I can't even say. Any of my more ardent readers might be able to tell you that Shaun of the Dead is basically my favorite movie. And as this is supposed to be what is essentially its American cousin, it was a no brainer (no pun intended) that I would be going to this. In other words, I had expectations so terribly high that I was setting myself up for the ultimate disappointment. Fortunately, the movie met my unbelievable expectations... and then some.

The earth has been taken over by a zombie virus, turning it into what the main characters call Zombieland. And each of the main characters are (essentially) named after where the characters are headed (or from). Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg) is a worrisome rule-follower, having a whole set of rules that have apparently kept him alive in Zombieland thus far. But when the meek Columbus meets the badass Tallahassee (Woody Harrelson), they form an unlikely friendship. Columbus is on his way to, well, Columbus, Ohio to see if his family is still alive. Tallahassee, on the other hand, is just enjoying the little things in life and searching for Earth's last twinkie (trust me, in context, it's not as ridiculous as it sound). Then the two men stumble upon a couple of con artist sisters, Wichita (Emma Stone) and Little Rock (Abigail Breslin), on their way to Hollywood to visit a theme park so Little Rock can enjoy the little bit of childhood she has left.

And that's about it. The movie is more about the characters than the plot, really. Eisenberg plays his Columbus in his usual Michael Cera-esque nervousness. Emma Stone is just really freakin' hot (and sassy). Abigail isn't Little Miss Sunshine anymore, and has pulled in a bit of spunk. And the fact that Emma Stone and Abigail Breslin play con artists was just the icing on the cake, as (again) my readers should know how much I like con artist/heist films. And Woody Harrelson was born for the role of Tallahassee. Seriously, that man stole every scene he was in, which is a lot of them (though I was disappointed that the movie left out the line "I love the *beep* out of this song" from the trailer). I think the only times he was one-upped was during the much discussed extended cameo scene of a specific actor who anybody who knows anything about this movie, or has just looked at imdb, already knows about (but which I will not spoil for those who don't/haven't).

One aspect of this type of film that a lot in this genre (horror/comedy) have trouble with is finding a perfect blend of horror and comedy. Either they focus too much on the horror and the comedy feels off-putting (or they use the wrong kind of humor and it backfires), or they focus too much on the humor and the horror feels almost out of place. This movie found that balance. One of my favorite bits was the running gag of the rules for survival, as any zombie fanatic (like myself) just likes to come up with their own survival rules from time to time... or has read Max Brooks' Zombie Survival Guide.

But the suspense is there, too. Occasionally, they'll stop at a store or something like that, and they'll have to fight a zombie or two. But the best bits? Towards the beginning and at the end. The beginning bits with Columbus (both in his introduction and in the flashback sequence) is both funny and frightening. But then you have the climax, which has to be one of the coolest zombie action scenes ever... not to mention one of the best uses of a set-piece ever. They really did not waste any inch of that theme park during the climax. It was suspenseful and all-around brilliant. However, I do want to warn the squeamish, this movie does have a lot of blood and gore in it. Sometimes they pull away, but sometimes they don't pull away at all and you see every hit or bite. It's not torture porn-level or anything. It didn't make me queasy. But a lot of people have weaker stomachs than me, so just a head's up. On the upside, they mix in a ton of humor around the times of gore, so the grossness is often offset by the comedy (if that helps at all).

I really don't know what else to say about the movie. Not only is it both funny and suspenseful (and acted well), but it's shot stylishly, too. There's great use of editing, camera, and a bit of funny slow-mo in the opening credits (which are great in and of themselves). It's currently rivaling Shaun, though I'm not sure if it'll surpass it; I'll have to see Zombieland a few more times to make sure. And I will, too. Definitely. But it is now one of my favorite movies. I strongly recommend it.

Royale With Cheese

(P.S. There's a scene after the credits that's kind of an outtake between Harrelson and the aforementioned cameo star... so don't leave too soon!)

Zombieland Restricted Trailer - This Movie Will Be AWESOME.

How is this movie NOT going to be freakin' awesome? Starring Woody Harrelson (as a guy named Tallahassee), Jesse Eisenberg, Emma Stone, and Abigail Breslin... this movie looks like it's going to rival even Shaun of the Dead. Seriously, check out this trailer.

SEVEN POUNDS.

When I saw the trailer for this, I thought it looked really good. However, as I was going into the movie, I still didn’t know what I was going to be seeing. Unfortunately, I still didn’t know what I was seeing until about halfway into the movie. Ben Thomas (Will Smith) is supposedly an IRS Agent going around doing a bunch of really big favors for seven different strangers, and for reasons unbeknownst to the audience. The first we meet is a blind man named Ezra (Woody Harrelson), who Ben is a complete jackass to. But then we come across Emily Posa (Rosario Dawson), a young woman with congenial heart disease. The relationship between Emily and Ben builds until they become more romantically linked. But Ben still has his mysterious mission to complete, even if it’s now become slightly complicated.

Let me start off by saying I thought the film was really good. I enjoyed it quite a bit. However, it tries to be too much of a mystery to the point where you really have no idea what’s happening… ever. Is Ben really the douche he seemed to be within the first ten minutes? Why is he helping these strangers? How are they connected? Or are they? Is he really helping them out, or is it part of something greater? What the hell is his plan, anyway? Everything about it is spoken in such ambiguous terms, it was almost like hearing “You know that plan about that thing we talked about that one time at that place? Well, it’s the next one’s turn now in the process of the thing I’m doing which you know of because of our history together… you know, because we know each other from sometime back in the day.” There were really moments where the movie almost felt like it was going out of its way to stay mysterious. Though the second it shows one of the first flashback glimpses of what occurred, everything snaps together and the movie becomes easier to follow. But this is two-fold, because this moment happens at the middle of the film (or so). So you’ve just gone through the first half of the film shrouded in confusing mystery, but now you’re going through the last half of the film with everything easily figured out.

However, those were really the only issues I had, and they really didn’t bother me all that much. I’ve read other reviews stating things like the movie is very slow moving, or it’s overly sappy or whatever. I didn’t have any of these issues. I felt that maybe the first 10 or 15 minutes or so were a bit confusing, especially in trying to figure out what kind of person Ben Thomas is (douche or saint?), but besides that I didn’t find it slow moving at all. And there’s some romance in there, and there’s a lot of heartfelt moments (no pun intended) that add up, but I didn’t think it was overwhelming at all.

In fact, Will Smith has shown once again that he can carry a movie. He did a very fine acting performance here. You never know what’s going on in his head, but you can always tell how conflicted or sorrowful or happy or whatnot he is just by looking at his face. He really dug himself into the character. The same with Rosario Dawson, too, who really showed that pain of not being able to live her life to the fullest because of her heart condition. But the one person I want to give the shout out to here is Woody Harrelson. He’s not in the movie very much, but he’s always a presence in the back of your mind, and I think that says something about how he pulled off the character. I constantly wanted to see what was going to happen next with his character, and he’s really only in the movie about 3 times, each time less than 5 minutes.

So besides some editing (or possibly writing) issues, I thought the movie was very good. It does tug at the emotions. It makes you happy when you’re supposed to be, sad when you’re supposed to be, and even uncomfortable when you’re supposed to be. I think that says something about the actors and actresses, because it was really all about the acting once you got the story figured out.

I Am McLovin!

NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN.

You know the drill: Oscar Movie + Small Town = Me Going ASAP. This time it was No Country for Old Men. This movie is about Llewelyn Moss (Josh Brolin) who, while out hunting one day, stumbles upon a drug deal gone badly, as well as a couple million dollars in a suitcase. He does everything he can do to keep the money, but he’s being pursued by a crazy killer, Anton Chigurh (Javier Bardem), who is leaving bodies in his trail. However, local police officer Ed Tom Bell (Tommy Lee Jones) is also trying to find him, but to protect him.

For the most part, this movie was excellent. The acting was great, the story was good, and it was overall intriguing. There was very little music, but that was okay. The acting was good on all accounts, although Javier Bardem was very intimidating all on his own (he even made me nervous). And Anton’s air gun thing was an awesome weapon.

There’s only one real downer, and that’s the last 15-20 minutes or so of the movie, whenever the motel thing occurs and everything after that. It’s just like “that’s it? That’s how it ends? That’s lame.” It reminded me of Sunshine, except less confusing; it was just really disappointing. I guess you could call it anti-climactic, in more ways than one. And I'm pretty sure I understand what happened. I think I was able to put everything together (if you want my theory, hit me up in the comments). I still think the ending sucked.

Honestly, that’s about all I have to say about it. Great acting, great characters (and I almost laughed when Woody Harrelson appeared, because I totally wasn’t expecting it), and a decent story. It did remind me a bit of Fargo, but much better. Fargo annoyed the crap out of me. I couldn’t stand that movie when I watched it (I know, blasphemy). Anywho, I guess I’ll just score it, then…

A Keanu 'Whoa'

(Edit: After going back and reading Fletch from Blog Cabins' review of the movie, I have to say it's quite funny that our reviews are actually insanely similar, even down to mentioning Sunshine.)