FAST FIVE.

I've been following the Fast and the Furious series since the first one in theater. While the sequels have been more subpar, the action has always been a lot of fun. So there was little expectation that the fifth in the series would be any better. Funnily enough, this newest installment is actually probably the best in the whole series.

Picking up right after the end of the fourth installment, but before Tokyo Drift, Fast Five has Brian (Paul Walker) and Mia (Jordana Brewster) busting Dom (Vin Diesel) out of his prisoner transit bus. They end up in Rio and old friend Vince (Matt Schulze) talks them into doing a job for a bit of cash. Unfortunately, this puts them in a bad position with a criminal kingpin who runs Rio by the name of Reyes (Joaquim de Almeida). They know they need to quit the business and drop from the radar, but they need one last job to pull it off: stealing 100 million dollars from Reyes, which in and of itself is a near impossible task. And to top it all off, they have who is essentially a Black Ops guy named Hobbs (Dwayne Johnson) and a local cop, Elena (Elsa Pataky), after them to bring them in after they're accused of killing government agents. To help pull off the job, they bring in some old friends: Roman (Tyrese Gibson), Tej (Chris 'Ludacris' Bridges), Han (Sung Kang), Gisele (Gal Gadot), Leo (Tego Calderon), and Santos (Don Omar).

The best way to describe the film is like The Fast and the Furious meets Ocean's 11. This is an over-the-top heist film through and through, with a bit of the added car flavor that the F&F films have always delivered. Of course you need previous knowledge of the films to have any idea who these people are and how they're connected (Hell, I've seen all the films and even I couldn't remember a few of them). Though there are some where the previous relationships aren't important--such as the characters I couldn't remember (Gisele, Leo, and Santos; for the record, Gisele and Leo are in the 4th film, which I only saw once, and Santos is actually a new character, which would explain me not remembering him). But if you haven't seen the previous films, there's a lot that's going to go over your head.

Anyway, the action is fantastic. Of course it is completely over-the-top and unrealistic, but they at least attempt to do it in as realistic a way as possible--an issue I had with the 4th film where there was some CGI because it was so unrealistic. In fact, the only issue I had in the movie with the action was the only issue I knew I'd have based on the trailer. When the car flies off the cliff and Brian and Dom jump from it as it falls toward the water--there's no way you can survive that fall, at least not completely unscathed. Otherwise, everything was fine. By the time we reached the end of the film, I had completely shut my brain off and wasn't bothered by the fact that 1 or 2 cars were able to pull a 10-ton safe (or something like that). And the big fight between Vin Diesel and The Rock? How awesome was that!

The heist aspect is a lot of fun. Just like the Ocean's films, we're given an ensemble where each person has their own job to do. Granted, by the time we reach the actual heist, some things have been rendered completely moot, but everybody still essentially has a job to do. Leo and Santos give us a lot of good comedy, though they aren't the only ones. Still, the film does have a bit of a tonal shift once the team joins in about halfway through. The first hour or so is a bit serious and gritty; however, once they get the heist idea and bring in the team, things become a bit lighter and more fun.

Currently, I only own the first film of the series. The second is OK, but it's the only on that doesn't include Vin Diesel (if you count the Tokyo Drift cameo), so it loses a bit due to that. Tokyo Drift isn't awful, but it's not much better than eh. I was pretty hyped right after seeing Fast & Furious, but after I let it sink in and thought about it more, the more I realized I didn't care for it all that much. It had a lot of action and I was hyped from seeing the original cast return, but outside that, it was pretty rough around the edges. So I allowed Fast Five to sink in for a couple days before writing the review... and I still maintain that it is one of--if not the--best of the series.


Royale With Cheese

(P.S. Yes, I really dug it that much. It's the heist factor--what can I say? It's not perfect, but it's a ton of fun. Anyway, stay tuned after the credits begin. There's an extra scene about halfway in that gives you quite a cool twist for those who have been following the series.)

FAST & FURIOUS.

Alright, so I’m gonna start off by getting the ‘bad audience’ bit out of my system. It was sold out, which I haven’t been to a sold out movie in ages. I was packed in like a sardine, and the dude next to me really liked his elbow space. Like, you know, over the arm rest and into my ribs. Then the jackasses behind us (I swear it was the entire row) kept making stupid jokes half the time. And they weren’t even whispered or just mumbled among themselves. These were called out loud for all to hear. And they weren’t really remotely funny. Just a bunch of douches who thought they were being cute. Then there was somebody at the far back of the theater who really had a thing for his laser pen. Throw in a couple instances of screaming children, too. And finally, what is a packed theater experience without at least two people sitting far ahead of you texting the entire time, shining the light of death for all the theater to see?

And I’m sure if you’ve been keeping tabs (I doubt it), you’ll have realized that usually, when I have a bad or annoying theater experience, I usually have a pretty bad review to follow it.

Not this time.

No, not even all of that mess could have taken away the great fun that Fast & Furious gave. For those fans of the series, this installment takes place after the second film, but before Tokyo Drift, about five years after the original film. Dom (Vin Diesel) and his girlfriend Letty (Michelle Rodriguez) are living in the Dominican Republic, stealing gas to sell on the street… but from currently moving envoys, of course. But after a terrible occurrence, Dom is forced back into America where he eventually meets back up with his sister Mia (Jordana Brewster) and the newly reinstated FBI agent Brian O’Conner (Paul Walker). Together, though for completely different reasons, they must infiltrate a drug cartel. Lots of stuff happens from there.

The movie starts off with a bang, though we’ve seen a lot of it in the trailers. It’s the scene with the big tanker truck that Dom and Letty attempt to highjack, which turns out a bit more… explosively than originally planned. There’s also a nice tie-in to Tokyo Drift during this segment with one of the aforementioned movie’s main characters, showing how Dom knew him (as mentioned at the end of said movie in Vin’s brief cameo). And from there, the action continues on, switching over to yet another scene we know from the trailers—O’Conner chasing down a man through the streets for information. So straight off, our adrenaline is already pumping like crazy.

And the movie has its quiet moments, but usually just to set up the plot of the action sequence to come. Though there are some character development scenes sprinkled in, as well. But for the most part, the movie is just a ton of action. And the action is gloriously splendid. They really amped it up, from busy-street racing to underground-tunnel racing. Not all of the action is car-oriented, of course, but the majority of it is. And if you’re going in for the racing action (and you know you are), you’ll be more than satisfied.

If I had any complaints, it would be that Jordana Brewster’s Mia was hardly in the movie, and she could have used a much bigger role, especially considering the rift in the relationships caused by the events of the first film. So by the time anything is really settled between Mia and Brian, it’s slightly hard to take because of her lack of screen time and re-connection with Brian. My other complaint would be that I got confused with what was going on a couple of times, but that could have just been the fault of the distractions due to a bad audience.

There’s really not a whole hell of a lot to say about this film. You’re not going for a masterpiece of acting. You’re not going for a masterpiece of plot. It has a decent story with some average action movie acting, but some really awesome action and some pretty funny moments, too. I might dare say it’s as good as if not better than the original. The only thing the original might have over this one is more character development and/or interaction. But on the whole, this one was pretty damn good.

A Keanu 'Whoa'