THE EYE.

I had seen, and loved, the original Chinese version of The Eye a few years back. When I first heard they were remaking it, I was both excited and nervous. This project has been in the process of being made for a long time now. It had gone off radar for a while, but then, not too long ago, it showed up again, and it was starring Jessica Alba. So now that it’s out, I’m finally able to give my verdict. To catch people up, The Eye is about a blind violinist, Sydney (Jessica Alba), who gets a corneal transplant. However, she soon starts seeing things that she shouldn’t be, namely horrible situations, ghosts, and the very angry ‘shadows’ that transport them to the afterlife.

Now it’s been a while since I’ve seen the original, but I did get flashbacks while watching this version. So, in other words, there are some similarities between the two. However, I still think the original was better (of course). This one didn’t awe me as much (or creep me out as much) as the original, though that could be partially due to the annoying jerks sitting behind me who liked to talk really loud and refuse to silence their phones (Four times it rang, and he answered. FOUR).

Anywho, the only real characters you can get attached to are Sydney and this dude named Miguel, though Miguel isn’t in the movie enough to really matter. But he’s a nice guy nonetheless. Everybody else is either ‘blah’ or a jerk. The biggest ‘blah’ character is Sydney’s sister, Helen (Parker Posey), who gives such a mediocre performance that she’s really more like a random woman in the movie. The biggest jerk would be the potential love interest, Paul (Alessandro Nivola), who really is just a big a-hole. Sydney even calls him on it at one point. But then they randomly throw in scenes where you’re supposed to like him, or that Sydney’s character is supposed to grow more attached to him, but it just doesn’t work. The whole time you’re just sitting there like “This dude’s an ass.”

The visuals were good, though the ‘shadows’ reminded me of like a mix between Voldemort and the vamps from I Am Legend. The movie had a few creepy moments, but really only one or two big jump-scares. The original, again, was much creepier, though; especially the elevator scene, which was much more effective in the Chinese version. And the “Have you seen my report card?” kid in the original was creepy, though the one in this version was almost laughable.

Though, the movie wasn’t horrible. It did manage to entertain for what it was. But it didn’t do anything special, either. There was even a point in the movie where it makes fun of itself, as Sydney is about to say “I see dead people,” but Paul finishes her sentence and then laughs in her face. So in the end, this movie wasn’t awesome, but it didn’t suck, either. If you thought the premise was cool, you can check this one out, but I’d much recommend the original first. At least that one doesn’t have voice-over narration by Jessica Alba. The Eye gets…

Stop Saying Okay! Okay.

(P.S. The girl who plays Ana Christina Martinez totally looks like the girl who plays Alex on Lost. I would have sworn it was her while watching the movie, but it’s not.)

Random Ramblings of a Demented Doorknob…

Also known as R2D2 (No relation). I just have time to kill before class, I’m bored, and I have a bunch of things on my mind that wouldn’t really fit under any cohesive article… therefore, I have this! So here I go.

- Diary of the Dead comes out next month! George Romero claims that he hasn’t been this excited about one of his movies since the original Night. That makes me excited. Also, there’s gonna be a contest to go along with it where you make a horror movie short and send it in, and Romero watches each one, picks a winner, and the winner gets to go on the Diary DVD. I’m insanely tempted to try for it.

- How the hell does Uwe Boll still keep getting funding AND big name actors? His movies have never done anything but bomb horribly. His latest, In the Name of the King, didn’t even make the top 10 box office over the weekend. One of my co-workers saw it—and we don’t always exactly have the same opinion on movies (sometimes we do, but a lot of times we don’t)—and even she thought it was crap. Also, how do you pronounce the dude’s name? Is it ‘you’, like one of those sheep things, or You-Hey, or You-EE?

- Cloverfield comes out this weekend! I’m excited. It’ll either be really awesome or the hype will have killed it. I’m half inclined to really want it to actually be the stay-puffed marshmallow man like that one spoof trailer shows.

- What is it about movies when really good characters die at the end, and you go through the whole movie hoping that the ending will be different this time around, even if you’ve seen it hundreds of times already? (I watched Cube last night again, and I always hope that the one person who dies at the end doesn’t). Or am I just crazy and the only one who ever feels that way?

- I’m both excited for and wary of the upcoming The Eye. I saw the original Asian version a few years ago and it’s an excellent movie. It’s creepy and suspenseful. That elevator scene is intense. And then the ending is just mind blowing. But now it’s being remade with Jessica Alba. That’s the first thing that worries me. I mean, the girl is great to look at, but she’s not the best actress out there. On the other hand, it looks like they still have the elevator scene AND they’re keeping the same ending, so that’s good. Anyway, it comes out next month, I think, so I’ll keep an eye out for it (sorry, I couldn’t resist).

- The song from the second half of the Hellboy II trailer (assuming it’s a different song from the first half) is freaking awesome.

- I just found out that one of my favorite Horror/Comedies, Feast, is getting two sequels: Feast II: Sloppy Seconds and Feast III: The Happy Finish. And they both have sexual related names. I find that funny. Feast went above and beyond the B-Movie/common horror genre. It did what was highly unexpected in how things happened and who lived/died. Every Hollywood horror law is broken in the movie, so you never know what’s gonna happen next, and that’s exciting. And the sequels are being written and directed by all the same people, which is a plus. I so cannot wait.

- Is anybody else super hyped for Jumper? I heard it’s almost nothing like the book, but hey… I haven’t read it, so I don’t care! :P

- Has anybody else heard of the upcoming My Name Is Bruce? It stars the legendary Bruce Campbell… as himself… and some people mistake him for his character of Ash from the Evil Dead series and ask him for help to fight a town of monsters. It looks so freaking cheesy awesome. Classic Bruce Campbell.

- Did anybody else catch the 2-night season premier of Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles? This show looks like it’s gonna rock the house. And Summer Glau is so hot. How can you not love this picture?

- I’m so upset that the character Michael is coming back to Lost. I was so happy when he left the show. He got on my nerves so bad. I’m upset now.

- While we’re on the subject of TV and people stuck on islands, the castaway list for the next Survivor was released a week or so ago. For those who don’t know, this season is going to have Fans vs. Favorites, where favorites from previous seasons come back to face true fans of the show. Well, I have no idea who I’m gonna root for now… because Yau-Man, Ozzy, AND James are returning. And even Johnny Fairplay is coming back. I’m not rooting for him, but he’ll be fun to watch. This is gonna be an awesome season.

Anywho, that’s all I can think of for right now. I’ll leave it at that. Later!