Hey guys and gals! Can you believe it? It's been 5 years since I started this thing. Well, technically, I started blogging before this with a site called Boomstick Reviews that lasted maybe a couple weeks or so before I switched it over to this.
Due to this blog, over the last 5 years, I've had so many great experiences and made so many great friends--and even met some of them in person! In order...
Rachel Thuro (and Brad) - Just as fun to hang out with as she is to podcast with--and she's so far my first and only person to face-to-face podcast with!
Jess Rogers - I can safely say this was the most nervous I was meeting somebody (and although we didn't eventually work out, I don't regret it for a second).
Dylan Fields (and Susannah/Alexandra) - It was an epic of epic days as we traversed the Riverwalk of San Antonio. Oh, and there was some extensive Vlog filming, as well.
Tom Clift - Really cool guy, and it was a pleasure to hang out with him for the day talking movies and being bombarded by the homeless.
James Blake Ewing - I assure you, he's not a robot! And I'm glad I got to find that out personally.
But anyway, as the 5-year anniversary came closer and my life started altering, I started thinking...
I've had 5 years on the blog. I had 5 seasons of The Vlog. There have been 5 seasons of The Demented Podcast. I'm finishing the 50/50 List. There were (or will be) 50 video game movie articles. (And if you don't count that, I'm sure I've eaten a $5 footlong at some point.)
In just a couple months, I'll be moving to the other side of the planet to teach in South Korea. And, frankly, I'll be too busy to keep up my blog. So I figured I might as well go out while I'm on top. That being said, I'm officially announcing that at the end of this year, after I finish the 50/50 List and the video game movies list, I'll make at least one last post and close down the blog. The timing just feels right, especially since I'll be moving to Korea for at least a year. (
Note: I won't just be disappearing. Steve and I are still going to attempt DemPod--part of that hiatus was to figure out if we could get it to work out while I'm over there. But it won't be until at least March or April or so.)
So for this post, to wrap things up here (despite the fact I'm gonna still post for the rest of the month), I'm gonna give you 5 Top 5 lists about the blog. The first four lists are going to involve films I've reviewed on the site--so they aren't just films I've seen, but specifically films I've seen and reviewed in some capacity on the blog over the last 5 years. Also, I am not counting any films watched for podcasts or on Man, I Love Films. They had to be written reviews for this blog. The last Top list is my Top 5 favorite posts that I've done... which is pretty self-explanatory. So here you go!
Top 5 Dullest Films Reviewed
This is a list of the most boring films I've had to sit through--and, oddly, only 2 of them were actually viewed specifically for the blog. I'm not saying these are all
bad films. They're just ones I found the most painfully boring to sit through.
5) Casino
I had to watch it for my 60/60 List last year. I watched at least half of it while Facebook chatting with Steve Honeywell because I was so painfully bored with it.
4) Funny Games U.S.
I actually recently watched the original... which I strangely kinda liked. But this one is just bad. And it's bad because it's missing that certain something that made the original a little more captivating.
3) Nobody Knows
A 2-hour long Japanese drama (and true story) about a mom who leaves her young children alone in an apartment to fend for themselves for months on end. It's really depressing and unbelievably slow. It's a really good movie, but I don't think I could sit through it again.
2) Gosford Park
Ugh.
1) 2001: A Space Odyssey
Y'all knew this was coming. This was my most controversial post... probably ever. I reviewed this for my 60/60 List last year, and it led to quite a few arguments and one major falling out. But I still stand by my opinions--eff this movie (except the HAL9000 part. That was fine.)
Top 5 Weirdest Movies Reviewed
This was easily the hardest list to put together. I've apparently seen a LOT of really freakin' weird movies. Seriously. I tried to narrow this down to 5 from like 15 or 20 and was really struggling to do so. I think I finally managed to do it, though. Here's the Top 5 Weirdest. (And I mean weirdest. When the likes of Visitor Q, I'm a Cyborg But That's OK, Rubber, and Southland Tales don't make the list…)
5) Feast 3: The Happy Finish
Let me share a paragraph from my review on how the movie ends: "So the three, including Clu Gulager's character Bartender (who is at least in his 80s), walk out into the street. So then out of nowhere, Bartender is like 'We need to repopulate the Earth! We need to do it now!' and he rips off his shirt. But then a giant robot leg comes out of nowhere and steps on the other two survivors, crushing them. Bartender walks away, and a Mexican mariachi dressed like Elvis walks on screen and serenades the audience during the credits by summarizing the last 3 movies."
4) Eraserhead
It's David Lynch. It had to be on this list by default.
3) Super Mario Bros.: Peach-Hime Kyushutsu Dai Sakusen
Seriously. This little animated feature was BIZARRE. I mean, when you think of how a Mario movie would logistically work and how strange that would actually be... multiple that by 10 and you'll get this film.
2) The Happiness of the Katakuris
I remember basically nothing about this film except that it's directed by Miike and that it almost melted my brain from its bizarreness when I watched it. It's a dark comedy musical about a family that kills... or something.
1) Hausu
It's freakin'
Hausu. It's like the ultimate Japanese weird-awesome movie. The weirdness level is off the charts, and the majority of the film makes no sense... but it's still so damn entertaining.
Top 5 Best Movies Reviewed
This isn't necessarily my Top Rated films (at least at the time that I rated them). These are the films that, for one reason or another, I watched specifically for this blog that I found had the best mix of quality and entertainment. In my book, these are five damn near perfect films (mostly classics) due to that fine mix. And yes, I reviewed all of them for either the 60/60 or 50/50.
5) North by Northwest
This was my favorite from Hitchcock Month, and I pretty much went straight out and bought it right after seeing it (still haven't re-watched it yet, but... soon).
4) Naked
A flawless performance by David Thewlis with such philosophical, stream-of-consciousness dialogue. It's darkly comic, and I was floored after it ended.
3) Double Indemnity
This became an instant favorite classic after I viewed it. I'll buy it eventually. Such a perfect mix of acting talent, writing talent, directing talent... all of the above and more.
2) A Clockwork Orange
I constantly go back and forth in my mind on which Kubrick film I prefer more--this or The Shining. But I think the mix of colorful yet strange visuals and cinematography, classical music, and a fantastic lead performance continues to put this one over the top. I love this movie.
1) Seven Samurai
I haven't watched it since my initial viewing last year, but I still maintain that, despite its long running time, this is one of the (if not the) greatest movie ever made. Drama, action, romance, comedy... this movie has it all, and it has it with masterful directing and visuals, as well as a cast that can pull off the perfect performances needed.
Top 5 Worst Movies Reviewed
Too bad I'm not counting podcast reviews, or else Catwoman would be on this list. This was also a tricky one to narrow down. As most of you know, I've watch a lot of shit films over the years. So finding the worst 5 was hard. I had to narrow the field somehow, so I decided to automatically cut the "so bad its good" films like Troll 2, The Room, and Shark Attack 3. From there, I basically narrowed it down to the films that gave me the strongest emotional reactions. And here is that list.
5) The Spirit
A friend actually forced me to see this in theater with her, despite my warnings. There were only about 3 other people in the theater with us. About 5 minutes in, we turned to each other and said "This is the worst movie I've ever seen." From that point on, we MST3K'd this bad boy, and I'm pretty sure the other patrons enjoyed our version much more.
4) The Last Airbender
What a disgrace to what is such an amazingly fantastic television show. It would have been difficult to screw this up any more than it did. Of course, it would be possible to do it. Because then you'd have...
3) Dragonball Evolution
Talk about ignoring source material. This film is so atrocious as both a film and an adaptation (and it's even worse as an adaptation). This film makes want to send a thank you card to Shyamalan for sticking as close as he did to the source material for Last Airbender (and if you've seen both the show and the film, you know how not true that is). Such a disgrace to the Dragonball franchise.
1) Salo, Or The 120 Days of Sodom
Again, you had to see this coming. This movie is like my nemesis. And this is coming from a guy who has seen A Serbian Film. I will never watch this again. Hopefully.
Top 5 Favorite Posts
Finally, here are my favorite posts that I've done over the last 5 years. This one, actually, wasn't that hard to narrow down. I knew my #1 and had a couple ideas for others. Otherwise, I just went through all my posts looking for anything that jumped out at my memory. And this is what I came up with. And I will also link to all of these particular ones.
Runner-Up: Thoughts On The 28 ______ Later Movies
I wasn't going to do runners-up, but this one has a reason. This is kind of the post that started the "war." It really started on the second ever episode of the LAMBcast (Your Face is a Zombie Movie!), but here, before all that, I felt the need to explain in detail my feelings one why they aren't zombies.
3) A Serbian Review
Jason Soto and I did a Joint review for A Serbian Film where we both watched it and compiled all of our thoughts into a very fun and talky review style that I think turned out very well.
1) Troll 2 (Faux-Critique)
My favorite post ever is easily my positive review/snob critique of
Troll 2, which was a response to some haters who thought I wasn't going in depth enough with my reviews or giving films the time and consideration they deserve. So that's exactly what I gave them... in a very tongue-in-cheek fashion.
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Anyway, thanks to everybody for following along for 5 years! Stick around for the rest of the month! There's still more reviews to come, and at least one final post at the end of the year before closing up shop. I hope y'all have enjoyed my blog as much as I've enjoyed being here with all of you.