V.G. Movies #33: Max Payne.

[Welcome back to the Evolution of Video Game Movies series. Every week, I will be moving forward through time, starting with the earliest and ending with the most recent of video game movies. I will be detailing the histories of the games and how the films came about, and both my and fan reaction to the adaptations. Practically all of my background information is either common knowledge or from Wikipedia. So without further ado, let's move on to the next film on the list.]

THE HISTORY

The game was first released in 2001 as a third-person shooter. The game is known for its noir and comic book elements, Norse mythology connections, and its heavy use of bullet-time action and Hong Kong cinema style. Max Payne is a former detective and fugitive DEA agent whose family were recently killed. They were connected to a case involving a drug called Valkyr, so he goes undercover in the mob to find out who was responsible and will kill anyone who gets in his way. (And why go into more details because, honestly, do any of you actually read this?)

I've never played the games, so I can't say how close the film came to them. From what I heard, it strays pretty drastically, despite being similar on the surface. So I know something went wrong somewhere... so let's see, exactly, where that was.

THE FILM

I actually saw this one in theater originally, though I hadn't seen it since. However, I didn't hate it by any means then. I thought it was a bit average, but had its moments. Does it live up to those memories, though? Max Payne (Mark Wahlberg) is a Cold Case detective who has been secretly hunting his wife's killer for 3 years. His newest lead gets him caught up in an underground street drug called Valkyr that causes dangerous hallucinations for most. Teaming up with a woman named Mona (Mila Kunis)--whose sister was also recently killed due to her connection to the drug--Max gets mixed up in this dangerous underworld while hunting for the man who killed his wife.

The strongest aspect of the movie is definitely its visuals. This film is pretty damn gorgeous. The overall aesthetic is fantastic. Even the CGI is great. But... unfortunately, that's about where it all ends.

First you have the really strange choice of actors. Mark Wahlberg can be good in certain films, particularly if he has to act over-the-top or comical, but here--as he's playing it straight and serious--he's just bland. And then there's the casting of Mila Kunis as the film's femme fatale... which is just bizarre. I can't for one second believe her as this character, and it's just so beyond a bad and strange casting decision. Chris "Ludacris" Bridges is also in the film, though I always end up liking him and thought he did well.

The worst thing is that the film breaks the cardinal rule of cinema... and it's just plain boring. There's zero action for basically the entire first hour of the movie, so we're left with Wahlberg and Kunis to carry the film on their charisma (which, of course, neither have here). It's also slightly confusing as not much is explained and characters just show up for no reason as plot devices. And just what exactly Mila Kunis is isn't explained, either (though she's apparently an assassin... a fact I seemingly had to look up the first time I watched this, as well). And there's no suspense or emotion anywhere as you can't connect with any character. Actually, there's a brief 1-2 minute scene where they talk to this tattoo parlor guy, and he was cool just knowing random shit about Norse Mythology (even had a book lying around). I would rather have seen a whole movie following him.

And then the action itself wasn't all that exciting. The games apparently are very much inspired by the likes of the Wachowskis and John Woo and put an emphasis on bullet time and slo-mo. There's definitely some of that here, but it's done so... awkwardly. I read somewhere else where someone said that it was almost more of a parody of bullet time, and that's definitely true. There's a sequence (one that I even remembered from the theatrical viewing) where Max bends over backwards to shoot a guy behind a railing behind him. Just to fire one bullet and shoot this guy takes roughly 45-50 seconds. It's freakin' ridiculous and almost comical in its execution. Otherwise, there's really not much action in this film based on a stylized action game, and when there is... it's pretty dull. Actually, the closing credits almost have more action than the rest of the film as it's just CGI guns shooting for a minute or two.

Speaking of the credits, the movie just kinda ends. There's no real denouement. It's just over. So you sit through what is a very pretty movie, but for no real good reason besides that. The story is dull. The action is dull (and sometimes so stupid it's funny). The casting is way off. I haven't played the game, like I said, but I can imagine why fans were disappointed. I thought it was entertaining when I saw it in theater (with the exception of that ridiculous 1-minute slo-mo gunshot). But on this second viewing, I have no idea what I was thinking. I actually went back and looked at my original review, and it's interesting that I basically felt the exact same way this time, but with stronger emotions that led me to disliking it much more. Anyway, I think "pretty/boring" sums it up well.


Feed Me, Seymour!

DVDs Or Death!

Again, I haven't done one of these since October! But I thought it was high time to bring it on back. It's time for DVDs Or Death!

Moonlight: The Complete Series.

Brief Synopsis: Vampire Detective Falls In Love With Human Reporter.

Comments: How very Twilight-esque, I know, but it's so much better. I caught this short-lived television series while it was still on TV, and it was quite original. It's so sad that it only lasted so short a time, but if you're a fan of vampire stories, I'd really recommend this series. It's a lot of fun.

Viewing Option: T.V. (if I can find reruns... though I recommend others who have not seen it to rent).

Saw V.

Brief Synopsis: The Fifth Installment In The Saw Series.

Comments: It's certainly not one of the strongest in the series, but it's required for any fan. Like many penultimate chapters in a long series, it's mainly the calm before the storm. All the questions start to rise to the front, there's less action, and you get antsy for the conclusion. And it's been known for a while that Saw VI is going to be the end. So I think of this installment as just that: the slow, questionable calm before the epic storm.

Viewing Option: Buy (What? I have all the others).

Henry Poole Is Here.

Brief Synopsis: A Story About A Guy That Finds Jesus... On His House.

Comments: I wanted to see this, but not only did it not come to my town, but it didn't get the greatest reviews. I still want to check it out, though.

Viewing Option: Rent.

Max Payne.

Brief Synopsis: A Detective Hunts For The Truth Behind Drug-Related Murders.

Comments: Well, I didn't think the movie was terrible. It wasn't awesome, but it wasn't as terrible as most people say. It had some really cool visuals, even if the story was a bit of a mess. But I don't think I'll be going out of my way to see it again.

Viewing Option: Skip.

City Of Ember.

Brief Synopsis: An Underground City Loses Power... And It's Up To Two Children To Help.

Comments: Again, I thought the premise sounded fun, and I heard the book is good, too. But then I heard the movie was quite a mess. I might just wait for this one to hit the old telly.

Viewing Option: T.V.

Igor.

Brief Synopsis: What Would Happen If Frankenstein's Helper Helped Himself.

Comments: It looked cute, and it has a great voice cast. It didn't get terrible reviews, either, from what I remember.

Viewing Option: Rent.

The Express.

Brief Synopsis: True Story Of First Black Guy To Win Heisman Trophy.

Comments: I was never a big fan of sports movies, especially football movies... which got very old after a handful being released every single year.

Viewing Option: Skip.

Repo! The Genetic Opera.

Brief Synopsis: Rock Opera About Organ Donation.

Comments: I've been waiting for this movie for a very, very long time, regardless of its including Paris Hilton (who I've actually read is, honestly, good in this movie. Perfect for the role). But I'm incredibly excited that it's finally hitting DVD. It has endlessly brilliant reviews on both IMDb and Amazon, with only a negative one sprinkled here or there (and those people always sound like crotchety old men with sticks up their butts), so that's even more exciting. And on top of that, it's been described as Rocky Horror Picture Show meets Blade Runner meets Sweeney Todd. How awesome is that? I also read that, at some point, three of its songs were up for Oscars. Obviously that's not the case with all the songs chosen in the Globes and elsewhere, but it still says something, right?

Viewing Option: Buy.

MAX PAYNE.

Most of the reviews I’ve read out there for this movie have been from huge fans of the video game. Well, now you have one from somebody who has never even played the game at all. Three years after Max Payne (Mark Wahlberg) lost his wife and baby to robbers/murderers, he’s still on the case trying to find the third member of the people who did it. Along the way he gets help from his old partner, Alex (Donal Logue); a mysterious woman, Mona (Mila Kunis); an old friend, BB (Beau Bridges); and a detective, Jim Bravura (Chris ‘Ludacris’ Bridges). They slowly start to discover that his family’s murder is tied to another set of gruesome murders that are linked together by some kind of Valkyrie tattoo and drug.

I’m not exactly sure what to say about this movie. It was bizarre, to say the least. As for characters, none of them show much of any development with the exception of maybe Detective Bravura, but that’s mostly because of how his character figures things out. The character of Mona seems random and unexplained. I had no idea who or what she was (Super gangster? Assassin? Government?) until I read up on the imdb summary that she was an assassin. Nothing about her character is explained, and her sister seemed to only be there as a plot device. The same thing went for Alex; he was only in the movie for plot development and nothing else. There were other characters like this, too, but I’ll leave it at that for now. And another thing that was never explained in too much detail were the Valkyries. Were they real or just hallucinations? It was as if some of the stuff could have been explained had they been fake, though some of the things would be pushing it. And if they were just hallucinations, why push their involvement so much toward the ending? Just for neat special effects?

And speaking of special effects, they really were done very well. Visually, the movie was amazing, from the special effects to the cinematography. Though I was kind of upset with the fact that the awesome ‘snow-on-the-gun’ scene as shown in the trailer wasn’t in the movie. I know exactly where the scene would have been, too, but it looks like they used a different (and less cool) cut. Oh well. But they did almost overuse slow motion/bullet time. And I don’t mean that in the way that it was all over the place, but rather when it was used, it was used for too long at a time. For instance, in one scene where Max bends backwards to shoot somebody, the whole thing is in slow motion, so a scene that normally would have taken one or two seconds takes nearly an entire minute to get through.

To take this a step further and discuss acting, I would have to say that it actually wasn’t bad. Everybody did a pretty good job, from Marky Mark to Ludacris and even Mila Kunis (though she seemed to be a bit awkward in the role of a badass). Oh, and the random appearance by Chris O’Donnell was fun. I hadn’t seen him in a movie since… hell… he played Robin. And even he did a pretty good job for his small role. And are there any Heroes fans out there? There’s a brief scene (seriously, about 10-15 seconds) that has the actress who plays Daphne in the new season. At least, I swear it was her. Anyway, that was just a random catch.

The biggest negatives that the movie has been getting have dealt with the super slow beginning and/or lack of action. The trailer shows the movie to be this non-stop, sci-fi /horror, action flick, and it isn’t. The whole first half of the movie is mystery/noir, and it builds up very slowly. However, this didn’t really bother me too much. But then again, I don’t mind some slow mystery to my action movies and don’t need non-stop mindless explosions for it to be a good film. The last half of the movie, though, is where the action really picks up, and it’s all pretty cool, though I think the climax was highly underdone and could have been a lot more fulfilling.

Overall, it was an interesting, though slightly confusing at times, movie. It could have done with more character development and a bit more explanations of things, as well. Also, that ‘almost-nudity’ toward the beginning was harsh. It reminded me a lot of Underworld 2 wherein the camera was in just the right spots to miss exactly everything. It was a rough PG-13 anyway… it should have pushed it a little further. But that’s just me. It wasn’t the greatest movie in the world, but definitely not the worst. And if you know Norse mythology (like me), or you’re just observant, the first big twist in the movie won’t really come as a shocker. And if you’re a fan of movies whatsoever, the second twist won’t come as a shock, either, because it’s the kind of thing that’s pulled all the time. Otherwise, fun action and great visuals.

I Am McLovin!

P.E.S.T.

I really have no good excuse. I've just felt really lazy (and/or tired) recently and haven't felt like blogging too much. That's why I skipped DVDs Or Death! this week... but I figure I'll make it up with a good round of Pre-Emptive Strike Thursday!

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Title: W.

Pre-Thoughts: I'm not sure. On the one hand, it's a movie about George W. Bush. On the other hand, it's a movie about George W. Bush. The trailers don't show too much, but you can't judge a movie like that. The last time I saw a movie that had a trailer that showed absolutely nothing, it turned out great (Burn After Reading). So, again... dunno.

Pre-Score:

I Am McLovin!



Title: Max Payne.

Pre-Thoughts: I really want to see this movie. I've only read one review for it thus far, and it was a negative one, but it was also a review from somebody on imdb (strike one) that is a hardcore fan of the video game (strike two). I think the movie looks visually stunning and really entertaining. And as I've never played the video game, I won't have that point of reference to complain from. And as I've been saying, this looks to be like for Mark Wahlberg what The Matrix was for Keanu. And I really hope it is.

Pre-Score:

A Keanu 'Whoa'



Title: Sex Drive.

Pre-Thoughts: Again, mixed reviews for this thus far. It's either incredibly boring and stupid, or incredibly hilarious and awesome. I've heard it's been compared to the likes of Road Trip and EuroTrip, though not even remotely as dirty (in fact, quite clean), but I still love me some EuroTrip, so I might check it out. Plus, it has a co-starring role with the actor that plays Dale on Greek, so that'd be fun. The most I've seen from him elsewhere is magical-appearing party-goer in Superbad. We'll see.

Pre-Score:

I Am McLovin!



Title: The Secret Life of Bees.

Pre-Thoughts: What can I say? I've seen one preview for this, and it looked pretty good... even though Dakota Fanning looked even more anorexic and creepy than usual. But it's not coming out here, so I won't be seeing it anyway. Oh well.

Pre-Score:

A Keanu 'Whoa'

R2D2... The One With Three.

So yeah... not much to talk about here. Just wanted to update on three wicked awesome things.

- Vin Diesel recently announced that he and David Twohy are still planning on making the two last Riddick films! This has me so excited, because I didn't think they were gonna make any more. The last one left off at such a cliffhanger, and it really needed more to fill out/continue the story. Plus, that just means more Riddick, one of the coolest sci-fi anti-heroes ever.

- On and even more nerdy side, the trailer for Dragonball will be coming out mid-October! I know I'm one of the few really looking forward to this movie, but whatever. If it has to be a guilty pleasure, so be it. I can't wait.

- So I recently saw the trailer for the Max Payne movie. Good God, that movie looks awesome. But my question is... for such a huge blockbuster-esque movie as this looks to be, why on Earth have they not advertised this more? It's coming out in October (it's the movie the Dragonball trailer is coming out with), and yet I didn't see the trailer until I went to see Mirrors. Huh...